Dr Ann Lawrence: Interview


To finish of this series I decided to listen to the interview with Stella O’Malley and Sasha Ayad for the Gender: A wider Lens series. It is undoubtedly a coup to be granted a rare interview with Dr Ann Lawrence. You can listen here:

Dr Ann Lawrence interview

For those of you unfamiliar with the series, Lawrence identifies as a Male ”Transsexual” and is open about his motivation to ”transition”; namely Autogynephilia, a sexual paraphilia. Definition below.

O’Malley is a psychotherapists and Ayad is a Licenced adolescent therapist both deal with young, clients who present with Gender Dysphoria. Needless to say I am not privvy to their client list but it seems reasonable to suppose some of their clients must appear to fall into the AGP category. I have seen at least one YouTuber describing his sexual motivation to identify as female even though it is usually a paraphilia associated with older males. We, perhaps, have the near ubiquity of porn to thank for this phenomenon.

Lawrence writes a lot about adult, AGP males and their tendency to reconstruct their childhood memories to deemphasise the sexual motivations for their ”transition” so I always listen with a degree of skepticism about AGP narratives. Lawrence is a controversial figure among what is called the “Trans” community for being willing to acknowledge autogynephilia. This probably makes him more honest than most but very early in the interview he makes a claim that even children can present with autogynephilia. I am immediately uncomfortable with this framing. I will become more uncomfortable when he talks about documented cases, in sexology literature, of penile erections in toddlers when allowed to play with female clothing. I have not located these sources but I am immediately concerned about the veracity of these claims or, if the research exists, the ethics of any research into the erections of three year olds. One of the central tenets of queer theory involves the rejection of social norms and many activists seem to get a perverse kick in exploring the darker side of human impulses, paedophilia and zoophilia being two.

Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria

Asked about this phenomenon it is clear that Lawrence has not encountered the work of Lisa Littman who coined the term (ROGD). On the one hand Lawrence says his own parents would have seen his case as Rapid Onset gender Dysphoria but he is also keen that his work is out there so AGP males have an explanation of their ”condition”. On social contagion he concedes that it is very difficult to be female in this society so, in the age of the internet, rising numbers of females in flight from their sex don’t surprise him. I wonder if Lawrence is self-aware enough to know that one of the difficulties women and girls face is the hyper-sexualisation of of our bodies. Autogynephilic men are literally projecting their sexist notions of what makes a woman onto their own bodies but also, by extension onto the bodies of all women. They associate being female with feeling sexually aroused which is inherently sexist. I don’t think Lawrence understands his role in the discomfort girls feel about their bodies once puberty hits, he laments the fact that women and girls are disrespected by broader society but lacks self-awareness of his own contribution to the treatment of women.

On the role of the internet Lawrence says had he had access to the internet he would likely have ”transitioned” earlier. As it was he left it till he was in his forties, at the time of the interview he was 71.

Narcissistic Rage

Lawrence is good in this segment as he talks about how many AGP males deal with their shame by projecting anger and exhibit entitlement with a lack of empathy. I covered his paper on this topic earlier in the series: 👇

Autogynephilia & Narcissistic Rage


Asked about transwidows, Lawrence expresses sympathy for both wives and children of ”transitioned” fathers. Lawrence says entering a marriage with severe autogynephilia to be cautious about entering marriage, especially if they are embarking on marriage as a ”cure”; especially if your erotic urges are entirely self-directed. Stella brings up the stories of AGP husbands who are abusive. Lawrence does not really address the abuse but concedes it can be very harmful to have an AGP family member.

Final thoughts.

Lawrence ends with his thoughts on teenage males who exhibit autogynephilia. He imagines a past where he would have had himself castrated to avoid any masculinisation. He makes the case for AGP as a sexual orientation which is immutable. He believes there are intelligent boys who know their own mind at thirteen or fourteen and these boys should be allowed to obtain medical intervention. As an aside he references the practice of castrating boys to create singers with a better voice range (Castratos). He is mainly concerned about better cosmetic outcomes.

He finishes with a debt of acknowledgement to Ray Blanchard.

I doubt Lawrence would have agreed to a more challenging interview format and the fact that Stella and Sasha are both therapists, and possibly also because they are female, may have prompted Lawrence to agree to speak. Any attempt to legitimise autogynephilia as a sexual orientation should, in my view, be fiercely resisted. Similarly agreeing medical intervention at 13 or 14 for any male is a dangerous suggestion. Lawrence focuses on the ability of the adult male to better pass and suggests there is a route back for males who take this path. Naturally occurring sex hormones play a pivotal role in pubertal development; which continues up to age 25. Blocking puberty does not just stop the developing of genitalia but also has an impact on brain development which is poorly understood. Lawrence is projecting his own, adult, wish fulfilment onto adolescent boys.

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Researching gender identity ideology and it’s impact on women’s rights as well as the impact on gay rights.


U.N Whistleblowers. Part 3


This is part of a series on an excellent documentary on whistleblowers who are exposing corruption at the heart of this billion dollar organisation. You can read part one, which contains a link to the documentary here👇

United Nations: Whistleblowers 1

Part one covers the testimony of a woman who worked for the Human Rights Council, at the United Nations. She exposed the U.N for naming Chinese dissidents (Ughur Muslims) to the Chinese, U.N delegation. To prevent her speaking on a virtual seminar, covering the issue of Ughur muslims, Swiss police were dispatched, by the United Nations, to try to section her. She was thus prevented from speaking. Embedded in that post is an article, by Vaisax Sundar, who asks why money to fight the A.I.Ds virus is being used to fund “Transgender” medicine in India.

You can read Part 2 here:

UN Whistleblowers: 2

Part Two covers alleged financial corruption at the U.N. The whistleblowers, in this case, had their reputations destroyed. One of them had his name leaked to the U.N employees, in Kosova, who he had accused of corruption, he feared for his life. The other man has been investigated for four years accused of using prostituted women.

Part 3 will cover Haiti

The United Nations embarked on a ”peacekeeping” mission to Haiti, during which time their negligence led to the introduction of Cholera, not seen there for over a hundred years, and the deaths of 10,000 people. The troops, stationed there, were also accused of multiple rapes of women and children.

We first meet Phillip Alston.

UK readers may recall Alston for his strong criticism of the Conservative government, in 2010.

Alston is not very complementary about the current Secretary General of the United Nations, Antonia Gutteres. Alston argues that successive SGs are ambition men, who prefer to turn a blind eye when confronted by wrong-doing. He is also critical of his predecessor Ban Ki Moon.

A local journalist covered the outbreak of Cholera and how it was traced back to raw sewage leaking from a U.N. base. A mother talks about the loss of her daughter who told her ”Mum you are going to lose your little girl”. After her death she could not bury her daughter who’s body was thrown into a pit. An attempt to obtain compensation failed because the United Nations, has immunity from prosecution.

Alston authored a report on the Cholera which contained the following:

Ban Ki Moon would eventually make a public statement apologising for the U.N’s role in the cholera outbreak. There would be no compensation for the victim’s families.

Sexual Abuse in Haiti

Next we meet a survivor of a rape by a U.N solder, she recounts how her mother had no food for her but soldiers were handing out cookies to local children. She went to the base, in her school uniform, and was brutally raped.

Local journalist, Jeremie Dupin, explains how we alerted the United Nations to the many rapes committed by their staff.

He goes on to explain that this was not isolated cases but this was widespread and systemic, U.N, personnel were behaving as if they were above the law.


Another U.N official becomes visibly distressed when addressing issues of sexual abuse/rape by U.N personnel. Like many of the other participants he began feeling proud of his employer but this turned to shame as multiple allegations of sexual offences emerged.

Eventually Bambera left the organisation

U.N Headquarters

The sexual abuse is not confined to third world countries. Female participants speak of a culture of sexual harassment. Jobs offered with demands for sexual favours. The women were forced to adopt strategies to stay safe. One woman talks of hiding in the women’s lavatories standing on the toilet so their shoes were not visible. Two woman talk of attempts to drag them out of an elevator to take them back to his room. One of the women named her attacker to her counsellor. As soon as she names him he told her there was nothing he could do. The perpetrator was his boss.

Surveys of U.N staff show a third had been sexually harassed/assaulted. Management sided with the perpetrators and one woman was fired based on false allegations. A woman hired to address the issues left because too many senior managers are complicit. This is what she had to say:

The final segment is chilling. A leaked conversation is played revealing that the fish rots from the head. Antonio Gutteres is named as cutting off a member of staff reporting the blatant sexual abuse that hapoened to a seior woman, by a man who put his hand inside her trousers. Another commentator says, in his view, the United Nations are corrupt at all levels. This makes the United Nations complicity in removing sex based protections, for women, all the more sinister. My next piece will cover their role in attacking sex based rights for women.

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Researching Gender Identity Ideology and the attacks on women’s sex based rights.


UN Whistleblowers: 2


Part two on the excellent documentary on UN Whistleblowers. Link to the documentary is in part one which you can find here. 👇

United Nations: Whistleblowers 1

James Wasserstrom: Case Study 2.

James Wasserstrom’s experience begins with the United Nation’s ”peace-keeping” mission in Kosovo. As part of that mission it was identified that one of the issues Kosovo faced was an electricity shortage. A project was underway to put the development of a new power plant out to tender. This was the beginning of Wasserstrom’s problems.

After consistent rumours, one participant was corrupt, Wasserstrom dutifully investigated and found enough to substantiate the claims and couriered his findings the General Secretary of the United Nations. One of the allegations was that a bidder was prepared to offer a kickback to the equivalent of 10% of the value of the contract; equivalent to 500 million dollars. This resulted in Wasserstrom being asked to become an official whistleblower, supposedly protected by the U.N’s own whistleblower policy. In reality, far from protecting him, his name was, instead, leaked to the very U.N staff he was accusing of corruption.

There began a sustained targetting of Wasserstrom, by his own colleagues with the ultimate aim of severing his, 28 year, relationship with the United Nations. At times he feared for his life.

John O’Brien: Case Study 3.

John’s experience shares many features with the experience of Wasserstrom, he also uncovered corruption on an institutional level. Contracts were handed out to friends and family and, when attempting to expose these practices, to his boss, O’Brien says he was told to keep quiet. On one project an Independent expert was brought in to review a climat change mitigation project. His conclusion was that the project was nothing but a money laundering vehicle.

The United Nation’s response 👇. From ”strong indicators of deliberate misappropriation” to case closed.

The United Nations also tried to discredit O’Brien; accusing him of visiting prostitutes even trying to interview his terminally ill girlfriend. O’Brien rejects these accusations and says he has clear proof it was fabricated. The distress at this betrayal, by their own organisation is palpable. The UN still have John under investigation four years later.

Wasserstrom suffered a similar fate and reports that job offers are withdrawn at the last minute, he believes this is because of the smears attached to his name.

My next piece will focus on the conduct of the United Nations, in Haiti, where their negligence led to a cholera outbreak that killed over 10,000 people. Additionally, many women and children were raped by U.N staff.

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Researching Gender Identity Ideology. This series looks at the United Nations who are utterly captured by this Ideology which makes them very dangerous for women’s rights. We need a UN Whistleblower to speak up about the Lobby groups persuading them to trash women’s sex based rights.


United Nations: Whistleblowers 1


For those of you with access to the BBC I can highly recommend a documentary on the United Nations which aired last night. Link below.

UN Whistleblowers

It covered their role in introducing cholera into Haiti, financial corruption on a colossal scale, sexual abuse and the betrayal of Uyghur human rights activists to China. I will do a series on the United Nations on this documentary because they are also a big player in the spread of Gender Identity Ideology. There is evidence of a lot of money being deployed to Lobby the United Nations on this issue. Documentary maker, Vaishax Sundar, coincidentally, sent me her piece on the United Nations deploying money, raised to combat Aids, to ”Transgender Clinics” in India. You can read that below 👇.

HIV route to Trans Surgeries


China: Emma Reilly (Case Study 1)

The documentary opens with a member of staff who is returning to her home for the first time in a year, after a hurried departure; necessitated because the United Nations had dispatched the Swiss police to detain her!

Later we will learn that her ”offence” was her opposition to the United Nation’s Human Rights Council revealing the names of Chinese dissidents, to the Chinese State. The Chinese delegation wished to know the names of 13 people who were planning to address the United Nations. They emailed Emma’s department to ask for the names ”as a favour”.

A meeting was held with the Chinese delegation and participants were left with the impression they had conveyed their refusal. Subsequently their boss had lunch with one of the delegates and, ultimately, the information was passed on, despite vociferous opposition from Emma and her colleagues. We then meet one of the dissidents, Dolkun Isa, and learn that Chinese authorities were dispatched to his parent’s house; who were told to ”re-educate me”. His mother subsequently died in a detention camp, in 2018, his father died, in 2020, circumstances unknown ; his younger brother was ”disappeared” in 2016 and another brother has been sentenced to 17 years detention.

Emma Reilly is asked if her parents know she is going to be in this documentary. This is her reply. This is what an actual Human Rights Activist looks like. Shame on her boss.

The documentary is peppered with the United Nation’s responses to the multiple allegations. This is their reply on the sharing of the names of Human Rights activists.

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Researching the social engineering generated by the spread of Gender Identity Ideology. Prioritising “Gender Identity” over biological sex primarily hurts women but also negatively impacts Gay Rights so Lesbians are doubly impacted.



Intercom Trust


I had a look at intercom trust in 2019. I am writing this in 2022. They first came to my attention when they one a Pink News award for their community work. It was presented by Dawn Butler. This is how describe their organisation:

At the time it was noticeably pushing transgender ideology but it had not populated the FAQ’s on same sex orientation. This was a screen shot from May 2020, where the FAQs still had not been updated.

I checked again, it is now three and a half years later: This remains unpopulated in 2022!

It was in May 2020 that I noticed Intercom Trust had also worked on a Transgender guidance pack for Cornwall schools. This was a collaboration with the POLICE! You can read my blog on this below 👇

Cornwall: Transgender Guidance

Intercom trust have attracted £774,859 from the National Lottery dating back to 2007.

If you check their website the promote a number of LGBTQ groups. 17 of them are ”trans” groups. There is no Lesbian Labelled group, for only females, or gay groups explicitly badged as gay and male only.

Woman on Wednesday’s

If you check the Women’s group this is the type of content a young Lesbian would encounter, the aptly names Woman on Wednesdays. Here same sex attraction is replaced by ”Women loving women identities”

Hairy Guys.

The gay men’s groups are not so explicit that the men have to include females. It’s almost as if this is a tale of two sexes.

This is a familiar pattern. They are emboldened to make a full frontal attack on Lesbian rights but a bit more hesitant about interfering with gay male’s rights.

LGB Alliance

In an interesting development LGB Alliance has secured a £9000 grant to undertake a scoping exercise for a new service to help young people who are Lesbian Gay and Bisexual. Many of us were concerned that this grant would be withdrawn as happened to a grant from the Arts Council. This grant was to make a film about older gay males. The explanation given for the withdrawal of funding was because of an attempt, currently underway, to strip LGB Alliance of its charity status. This action has been instigated by the charity Mermaids who fear their market share of gender non-conforming kids will dry up; if these kids realise they can have happy, healthy lives as Gay men, Lesbians or bisexuals. As intended this has delayed LGB Alliance initiatives and allowed critics to complain that LGB Alliance are not setting up positive initiatives. Mermaids is headed up by a heterosexual woman, by the way.

The Arts Council have distanced itself from the decision and blamed it on a local group. They were questioned about this decision by Damian Green, MP, in a parliamentary session. Something tells me this is not the full story.

If intercom Trust cannot even populate the FAQs for sexual orientation, run female only Lesbian groups but push Trans Ideology on gay kids then they ought to be honest and openly campaign as a Transgender Charity.

I am going to look at the National Lottery funding in this area. This will be the first of a series.
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Researching Gender Identity Ideology and it’s impact on society, especially women’s and gay rights.


Tranada: Canadian Activists.


I came across a YouTube celebrating Canadian people who identify as ”transgender”. One of them appeared in the BBC documentary on ”trans” children which I covered in my last piece. You can read that here:

Transgender Kids: Who knows best?

This is a short film put out for Pride month. The title tells us this will be medical professionals talking about what it means to be ”trans”. There is one doctor, one contributor is a psychotherapist and another has a background in sociology, the final one is an author with a naval background.

Medical Professionals on “Trans”

Hershell Russell

The trans-identified female appeared in the BBC documentary, covered above, and is extreme proponent of affirmation therapy for those she calls ”transgender” children. She is adamant that there is no need for mental health support for these children. She is very much of the view that ”we are who we say you are” and highly critical of the therapeutic approach of Ken Zucker.

She also does not think it is odd that she has strong opinions about other people’s children. To Hershell Russell these children are part of her community; the rainbow family. I cannot do justice to the messianic zeal displayed by Hershell in the written word, it is quite disturbing to see someone so evangelical about treatments which will render these kids sterile and lifelong medical patients. The eyes, though. 👆

Dr Carys Massarella

The medical doctor who appears in this short video is a heterosexual, late transitioning male who decided he needed to ”transition” after attending a ”transgender” patient on their deathbed. We are told the familiar story of a man who claims he has always known his ”truth” but married anyway in an attempt to combat his urges. He also exposes the conformity of this movement with this extraordinary statement. According to this belief system the ”cis” people are lucky because we are happy performing sexist stereotypes. So what does this man do? Long hair, make-up, mini-dresses. He’s a walking, sexist, stereotype of what makes a woman.

Dr Carys Massarella also works in a gender clinic so we are also treated to a glimpse of one of the patients, who is also hyper-feminine in presentation, and who explains that they don’t feel the need to disclose their sex. This veil of secrecy is why women’s consent is being over-written by gender ideologues who think it is their right to use spaces set aside for the female sex. Spaces which women fought for so that we could have a place in public life.

Aaron/Holly Devor

The next participant turn out to be the author of this book, written as a young Lesbian.

Holly now goes by ”Aaron” and is the Chair of Transgender Studies which was funded by a trans-identifed, male, billionaire. (Clip from 11th hour blog).

You can read the full piece, by Felicia, on @11thHour blog here: Holly went from being an open Lesbian to working with sex offenders, identifying as a man and becoming a champion of men’s rights to cross dress.

Aaron Devor

Aaron is also a full-on sex denialist. A sentiment he reiterates in the above YouTube:

Aaron also made this statement about paedophiles which beggars belief.

Stephanie Castle

Another participant was Castle, who was born in the North Of England and brought up by a domineering father. Castle talks about sneaking a book about the transition of Lily Elbe aboard war ship on which he was stationed during WWII. He eventually emigrated to Canada and between his two wives he was married for forty years and fathered children. He was 62 when his second marriage failed and he then began to seek out ”medical transition”.

1 did a bit of research on Stephanie and found a talk he gave in 2014.

Stephanie Castle

Stephanie claims to have had a very vivid dream, at the age of four, that he was a curly, haired blond girl. As he was born in 1925 he did not understand what it portended. He did tell his mother who told him never to tell his father or he would be sent to the local lunatic asylum. Thereafter he was restricted to secret cross-dressing and making sure he was not found out.

Later in life he did get chance to experiment at Fancy dress parties. He has two revealing anecdotes about this experience. A recurring issue is the barely disguised competition with their wives. Notice it is Stephanie who gets a custom made frock.

That was not the final, fanciful, anecdote from this party. Part of the pleasure seems to be derived from the anger of his wife. I am highly skeptical of this story but it suggests the sexual motives at play.

Stephanie also reveals that he was once banned from his Gender Clinic by a social worker who told him they did not accept voyeurs. Castle claims the motivation for this accusation was that he wished to write about his experiences at the clinic, we have no way of knowing if this was the actual reason. We do know that Castle set up the Zenith Foundation to support attendees from the Gender Clinic. After his death his archive was donated to the Transgender Archive. The Youtube has this addition to Castle’s story.

Transgender Archives: Vancouver Rape Relief.

Something tells me the Transgender Archives will prove useful to future researchers who want to understand how this triumph of unreality came to dominate political movements during this period. The curator seems inordinately proud to have the records of the attack on a rape crisis centre which only admits women. Kimberley Nixon was the TRA who went all the way to the supreme court to try to gain access to female rape victims. Vancouver Rape Relief have been resisting this since 1995.

What a legacy!

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Researching Gender Identity Ideology and the harms it is doing to women’s, sex based rights. Also the sterilising of our gay, autistic and other vulnerable children.


Transgender Kids: Who knows best?


This documentary is no longer available on the BBC which is a shame because it is one of the best. You can, however, watch it here:

Kids with Gender Dysphoria

The main focus is on Canada but there is reference to the U.K and an English detransitioner makes an appearance at the end.

The documentary opens with Ella, a very sweet, passing, trans-identifed male. Ellla had puberty blocked and cross sex hormones and, by age 17 they had the surgery formerly known as ”sexual reassignment surgery” but now often labelled ”gender affirming”. This is the preferred term for Norman Spack, another Gender Clinician, who makes an appearance in the documentary, though even he points out it is not possible to change sex. For the young ”transgender” participant their belief system is pure trans-activist speak:

The sacking of Ken Zucker

Ken Zucker was regarded as a world authority in addressing children who present with Gender Dysphoria but trans-activists were not happy that he practiced watchful waiting and talking /play therapy. They successfully campaigned to get him fired. Over 500 clinicians signed a letter in support of Zucker. One of the signatories, Ray Blanchard, talked about the politicisation of this area of practice and the chilling effect arising from his treatment.

Zucker, eventually, received substantial damages from his employer but did not return to his clinic.

Case Studies.

One parent, of a boy called Kareem, talks about her son’s belief he was a girl and how her son had attachment issues after a disrupted childhood. Karim’s mum was a single parent and her family, who had traditional values, were not happy with her early pregnancy. At one point Karim’s mum was overwhelmed herself and left Karim with his grandma. She believes this abandonment led him to over-identify with the female members of his family. She also believes he may simply turn out gay and thinks it is wrong to foreclose his options at such a young age.

Zucker also talks about one female child who had witnessed her mother’s murder and subsequently claimed a male identity. Eventually it became clear that she believed if she had been a boy she may have been able to protect her mother and, as a male, she would be less vulnerable to male violence. Affirmation only approaches don’t explore the subconscious motives for rejecting your birth sex. Zucker believes the affirmative approach is inappropriate and unsophisticated; both intellectually and clinically.

We then meet a little boy called Warner. His mum is confident her child is ”transgender” We get some insight into her thinking when she explains how she knows: Another proto-gay kid who’s parents prefer a girl over a gay son? Warner goes on to explain that he is not comfortable in the boy body and prefers girl toys and clothes. His parents have already ”socially transitioned” their son and are getting ready to put Warner on Puberty Blockers.

There is a revealing moment from Ella’s father who describes his ”daughter” running and explains how Ella has always been a girl. But this is not about sexist stereotypes!

Trans-activists in Canada.

Next we meet the woman responsible for legislation to ban therapeutic approaches to Gender Identity confusion. We first meet Dr Cheri De Novo, also a reverend, preaching about purported ”trans” people from the bible. She carried her messianic zeal outside the church to berate parents for putting their ”prejudice” above the welfare of their child.

Zucker has conducted his own research into suicidality in this demographic. Like the UK Tavistock he concluded that rates were no higher than in any other group with mental health issues. The attack on parental rights runs right through this ideology and Blanchard is right to highlight this within the adult, ”trans” identifying community.

The documentary quotes an activist openly stating that parents can be the problem.

Desistance versus Persistence.

The trans-activists, in this documentary, adopt a much more simplistic analysis. Here is one statement by a female who claims a male identity.

Hershell Russell is a psychotherapist and trans-activist who is delighted with messing with theories that recognise biological sex and those that argue our ”gender” is shaped by the society which we inhabit. Personally, I don’t dismiss either of the theories, in their entirety, I am fine with acknowledging a complex interaction between nature and nurture. Hershell seems to have a mystical belief in the existence of ”transgender” children. This is what she says about one of the parents she spoke to:

Meanwhile Devita Singh, Zucker’s colleague, actually followed 100 children with ”gender dysphoria” and found an 88% desistance rate. What is more she found no distinguishing features that predicted this outcome with any degree of reliability. Some of the more extreme cases did in fact reconcile to their biological sex. Furthermore the most likely outcome was these boys would be gay or bisexual.

Trans-activists don’t like the research that shows the majority of dysphoric males will desist and be ordinary gay males. Zucker goes on to speculate how many of these parents are homophobic. A gay male who ”transitions” can then be described as “heterosexual” which may be more acceptable in some, religious, communities. Ray Blanchard had this to say:


The documentary examines how sexist, gender stereotypes are embedded in gender identity ideology. They also cover the over-representation of autistic kids who are estimated to be seven times higher in referrals to Gender Clinics. As I have shown in my earlier work there is also a higher than expected rate of kids in care. This makes this movement look like a modern eugenics movement.

Alex and Lou’s story.

Alex’s father resisted any medical intervention for six years. His daughter was referred to Zucker’s clinic. Alex finally found girls who liked playing baseball and this allowed her to reconcile to being a girl with atypical interests. Lou, in the U.K, had competing mental health issues but nobody questioned her conviction she was male. At twenty Lou had a double mastectomy. She now regrets this and laments she will always have the legacy of her testosterone usage, in her voice and facial hair, and no breasts.

Lou’s advice to other girls struggling with their bodies is to get out in the world and find ways to inhabit your sexed body. When she looks back at pictures of her younger self she now realises she was perfect as she was.

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Researching Gender Identity Ideology, the impact on women’s rights and our gay youth.


Men trapped in women’s bodies 4


Part four on the book written by Dr Ann Lawrence, a self-proclaimed, autogynephilic “transsexual” male. Lawrence felt there were too few reliable narratives about autogynephilia and set about reaching out to men, with this condition, via his web-site. In the previous section Lawrence repeatedly warns AGP men are often unreliable narrators. He believes the stories he was told were more accurate because they were talking to a fellow sufferer and because he knew how to screen out obvious fake narratives. He was particularly prone to believe accounts which did not follow the script and had not been sanitised for public consumption.


Lawrence provided his subjects with the opportunity to contact him anonymously. He received 229 testimonials which met the criteria for inclusion as follows: They were required to meet at least two of the following.


I don’t thinks we can 100% believe the narratives we are told but the more shaming admissions may be accorded some validity. Lawrence calls this ”reluctant testimony”. Some of the men express relief about finally having somewhere to be honest about their proclivities even though more than one was horrified to be engaging in acts they called ”perverted”. Sadly, one effect of meeting up, even virtually, with other AGP men seems to be normalising the idea of women as pornographic muses for men’s erotic fantasies about us. Reading these narratives it is abundantly clear they are embodying their deeply sexist idea of what it means to be a woman.

Forced Feminisation

This comes up frequently. What these men are saying is that they cannot think of anything more humiliating than to be forced into being (treated as) a woman; who is naturally designed, in their warped mindset, for the submissive role. One talks about taping his genitals up so that he is ”forced” to sit to pee. The accounts bellow are very explicit 👇 on their forced feminisation fetish but one admits he lies to his therapist; an admission made by multiple other respondents.

One respondent categorily stated that, if they are honest, most transsexuals have these fantasies.

Rape fantasy

Autogynephilic transsexuals are heterosexuals but this does not mean having sex with other men is not a feature of their fantasy, or real, life. Some of this is what I think of as ”validation” sex , where the man is a prop to validation the AGP’s female persona. Some of them add a layer of humiliation by making it non-consensual. This makes them feel more authentic as woman, let that sink in.

Here one talks about fantasising about being gang raped, as a woman, by many men.

Woman as ”victim”

This excerpt is from a Master’s Thesis in which a man talks about how being involved on the fetish scene, as a ”submissive”, helped cement his identity as a ”woman”. After one brutal experience, where his ”safe” word was ignored, he opined that the experience validated him as a woman. {No, sunshine this just shows you are a man who does not see women as fully human}.

Just one of the ”girls”

Some of the men deemphasise the sexual component but insult women in different ways by deploying the most regressive, sexist, stereotypes always calling themselves ”girl” even when many are middle-aged blokes. Here is a classic of the genre: Somebody has watched Grease a few too many times. 😳

Man are also participating, without their consent, as the narrators get an extra thrill trying to hid their erections, when a man refers to them as Ma’am or treats them with chivalry. They want to be women (oops ”girls”) from the 1950’s.

Men = Logical. Women = emotional

Many of these men actually admit they are not women trapped in men’s bodies. Many of them are in, stereotypically, hyper-masculine occupations and are keen to point out how competitive and successful they are. This respondent talks about his masculine versus his “feminine” side in language that implies men do the thinking and females are all about feelings.

There are a lot of other quotes covering rooting through your female relatives/partners underwear, stealing and wearing sanitary pads all as aids to w**king. Many of them are open about getting erections or aroused in the women’s toilets or changing rooms. Sexual fantasies about becoming pregnant or breast feeding recur. Some get off on going shopping or having a manicure. Are there no sexist, reductive stereotypes, about women, these men won’t fetishise? Embarking on relationships with actual females sometimes induces a temporary halt to the fetish and a ”purging” of female attire. It soon returns. It has all the hallmarks of addiction and, rather than normalising this, and seeing it as a victimless crime, they should be made to confront the real harm they are doing to women’s, sex based, rights.

Why autogynephiles lie.

Of course there is an incentive to lie to therapists or anyone in a position to ”gatekeep” access to treatments. However, it is also verboten to admit these fantasies to other ”transsexuals”.

Lawrence speculates that this may be why some gender therapists claim not to have seen any/many autogynephiles.

Some of the respondents felt that Lawrence was doing a disservice to the ”trans” community by exposing the dark underbelly of their community.

People are starting to see us as something other than freaks” Exposing autogynephilia may ”screw that up”.

At the heart of this paraphilia is deception

Women (and men) cannot be allowed to see the truth. Some are open at the deception they practice. Carefully curating their image so women let their guard down. Here is one example.

Men will sometimes claim that all they get from wearing female clothes is a feeling of ”relaxation”. This is to obscure their real , sexual, motivation and encourage women to feel sympathy for a man who is, perhaps, taking a break from living in a stressful male role. Blanchard was not happy to collude with this deceit.


There is a lot more to be gleaned from these accounts. In particular it may be worth returning to Lawrence’s insistence that boys as young as three are experiencing sexual fantasies. This seems to be dangerous territory.

I just want to conclude with a couple of statements, by Lawrence, who appeals to men to present themselves as akin to natal women as they can. Adding, if this gives you an erotic thrill, so much the better.

Superficially his advice for male “transsexuals”, to exercise some humility about their relationship to ”natal women”, could look like empathy but it is really advice to his undercover brothers about how best to exploit women’s support. Imagine living with a man who studies you, and relies on you to educate him to better emulate your behaviour, while simultaneously destroying your sex-based rights. (See accounts from Transwidows, for how creepy this behaviour is). This is not symbiosis its parasitical.

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Researching Gender Identity Ideology and it’s harms; to women and girls and gay youth sent down a medicalised pathway.


Men Trapped in Men’s Bodies

In preparation for sharing the testimony of males with autogynephilia, Dr Ann Lawrence first explains why AGP males can be unreliable narrators of their own lives. Lastly Lawrence explains why he thinks the narratives he collected were more reliable.

First erotic arousal, while cross-dressing will either be omitted or it will be minimised.

They may indulge in a wishful falsification of their own childhood. This may not even be conscious. It may be outright, conscious lying but it could also be misinterpreting insignificant childhood events which, repeated often enough, are deeply embedded and fervently believed. For those men who have undergone significant, bodily, modification there may be a psychological need to believe this was inevitable based on the conjuring up of childhood memories. I would also had that given the shame associated with autogynephilia locating the desire in childhood serves to remove the sexual component, that is the source of the shame.

Bancroft (1972) documented a change in testimony from one patient who changed their story mid therapy. First they claimed they were of recent origin and then he retconned his narrative to report an earlier onset of the feelings.

Clients seeking access to surgery were more likely to misrepresent. Lawrence is of the few that, whilst sometimes this was deliberate it was “more often unintentionally”. I am not going to suggest all these men are consciously lying but I will only observe that there are many inconsistencies in the narratives of the transsexuals I have covered. There may be, as Fisk observes, ”pat histories”. How many accounts claim to have discovered their ”gender identity” at unfeasibly early ages at odds with child development theory? Alterations can be subtle, post-hoc rationalisations, outright denials or repressing a personal history that doesn’t reflect well on the subject. Note we have known about this compulsion to lie for over 50 years.

The subject may need to convince themselves as well as others. They may be more comfortable with the idea they are a true ”transsexual” rather than just a man who indulges in transvestic fetishism. The former has been granted some legitimacy, thanks to the rush to legally recognise ”transsexuals” by legislators across Europe and North America. The various ”Gender Recognition Acts” have conferred legitimacy on this desire of men to present, as the woman they love, on a daily basis.

Here is a handy list of the most common lies which ”transsexuals” admit to lying about. Lying about sexual arousal while wearing women’s apparel; pretending they are not sexually attracted to women/are attracted to men; pretending to have preferred toys associated with girls, as a child and claiming to have identified with female characters as a child.


Spare a thought for the wives of these men because they are not just re-writing their own histories but also those of their wives and children. In these cases the self-deception tips over into gaslighting and even abuse.

How reliable are Lawrence’s subjects?

Given all we know about the deception why would Lawrence’s interviewees be any more reliable? First of all they know they are speaking to a fellow autogynephile. They also have anonymity. Lawrence has also screened the respondents and weeded out those who were suspected of submitting narratives that had been published in earlier books about ”transsexuals”.

Lawrence had this to add. The MTF “transsexuals” that deviate from a ”true-trans” classic narrative are supplying ”reluctant testimony” which adds credibility. Those that own their early masculinity, heterosexuality and sexual arousal while cross-dressing are more likely to be truth-tellers. There is less motivation to misreport these things.

In the next piece I will cover the testimonies provided to Lawrence. His motivations may not align with radical feminist perspectives but he has performed a great service in documented this phenomenon.

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Researching Gender Identity Ideology and the impact on women’s, sex based, rights as well as the war on Lesbians, Gay men and the funnelling of baby gays to Gender Clinics.


Men Trapped in Men’s Bodies 2

Dr Ann Lawrence: copy below. 👇


This is the third in my series on the work of Dr Ann Lawrence and the second blog which focuses on this book. Lawrence describes himself a ”transsexual” and admits to having autogynephilia. {For neophytes this is a paraphilia where a man is sexually aroused at the thought of himself as a woman. Often this is sanitised as ”love of oneself as a woman” brushing the sexual arousal part under the carpet.}. Part one below.

Men Trapped in Men’s Bodies

“Transsexual” accounts

Lawrence looked for any published accounts of men admitting to being driven by autogynephilia. He finds some accounts which have all the hallmarks of this paraphilia but an explicit admission, or even awareness of autogynephilia, was in short supply. Here is one from 1978. 👇Note the envy and the confusion of sexual desire, this is the erotic target location error that is autogynephilia. Note also the masculine language of ownership.

The role pornography plays is evident from many of these accounts. This, from 1995, is Kate Bornstein, who married, fathered a child and broke away from the Church of Scientology; only to join the Gender Cult.

Another is Claudette Griggs who treats the real lives of women as their own sexual fantasy.

Deidre McCloskey is another late transitioner who followed the well worn path from transvestic fetishism to ”transsexual”. McCloskey is another one who has turned a masturbation aid into an ”identity”.

Erica Zander claims a Lesbian identity despite not meeting the most basic of entry requirements. This is reminiscent of Hunt’s account with the language of ”ownership” : “Have her and be her”. Note also the appearance of ”envy”.

Here the author claims the erotic arousal is an unwelcome side effect of their cross dressing. Another one who married and fathered a child.

The evidence of the sexual motivations for these ”transsexuals” dates back decades. Remember these accounts when someone tries to manipulate you with claims of ”true transsexual” or who hides their autogynephilia. Or, even worse, is open about their AGP and claims we need to normalise it.

Lawrence did not find enough accounts of autogynephilia in the public domain so decided to add to the literature by seeking anonymous accounts. Men with AGP tend to be unreliable narrators and Lawrence covers the motivations for lying at some length. I will cover the nefarious motives for this obfuscation in my next piece. Then I will cover the accounts given to Lawrence. Are men more honest when talking to fellow autogynephiles? What could be worse than the above accounts? Are there even darker accounts of this paraphilia? (The answer is a resounding YES, in case you were wondering)

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Researching Gender Identity Ideology and it’s impact on policy, law, especially pertaining to women’s rights and gay rights.